Drabbles Of The Bat Family
by Jewel1001
Summary: A series of drabbles about the family. Some humour and some angst. Includes Bruce, Dick, Jason, Tim, Damian, Alfred and others.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Basically short unrelated drabbles about the Batfamily. Not all canon, not all accurate but hopefully all good to read. Some humour and angst. Occasional reference to: Dick/Barbara, Tim/Conner Kent, past Jason/Talia al Ghul. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I own nothing

Chapter 1: 1 - 50

1. Most people in the family know that Damian is a fairly talented artist, but few ever get to see his pictures. He keeps the more private ones hidden in a box underneath a floorboard in his bedroom. Only Dick has ever been permitted to see one.

2. Bruce's latest birthday party involved cake, balloons, streamers and all four of his children. It also involved an all-out cake fight between the boys, with Dick and Damian versus Jason and Tim, a kitchen fire (which he blames on Dick even if he can't prove it) and spiked cola being fed to his ten year old son. Bruce blames Jason for that one and Jason never lets on that it was, in fact, Tim's idea.

3. When Tim admits his sexuality to his family and reveals his not-so-secret relationship with Conner Kent to them, nobody is surprised. Damian scoffs, Jason grins and teases him with rude comments and Dick remarks that he's 'got a winner there'. Bruce looks uneasy with the prospect of his son dating a 'relative' of Superman and Alfred just smiles acceptingly. However, when the couple get into a fight that leaves Tim on the brink of tears, it is the butler who insists that he's going to fetch the kryptonite.

4. Tim has smoked one cigarette in his entire life. He hated it the moment it touched his lips, but he finished it anyway because it was given to him by Jason and he didn't want to upset the delicate truce between them.

5. Bruce once commented to his eldest son that it was wonderful how comfortable Damian was with crawling into bed with Dick, seeking comfort, after one of his nightmares. He told Dick how proud he was of their close relationship. Dick will never tell Bruce that he would do and has done the same thing for both Tim and Jason.

6. Jason once gifted Damian a kitten in secret because he knew it would annoy Bruce.

7. He's under penalty of death if he ever admits to it, but Tim visits Jason in his apartment once a month. They have a drink and talk about the family; about Bruce and his ways, about Dick and his relentless cheeriness towards them all, and about Damian, who they still regard as the devil child. Neither one knows how much the other values these monthly visits.

8. The first one to get Tim drunk is not Jason, as Bruce expected, but Dick. Turns out that Dick was drinking alcohol while Tim was drinking soda, and the two got mixed up. Dick was too drunk already to notice and Tim didn't point it out.

9. Talia once showed up for a 'friendly visit', as she so snidely put it, at the manor. Damian doesn't know what hurts more, that she ignored him entirely or that she pecked Jason on the cheek.

10. When the anniversary of his parents' death rolls around, Dick sits at their graves for over an hour, just sitting in silence and thinking about them. At one point, somebody comes and puts a blanket over his shoulders, then leaves without saying a word. Out of instinct, he assumes it is Bruce. Damian will never correct him.

11. Damian secretly likes lemon sorbet. In fact, it's a peculiar favourite of his. He only pretends to hate it because admitting to liking it would mean that he and Tim actually share a fondness for something.

12. After finding the emotionally broken boy in an alleyway in the roughest part of the city, Jason cares for his younger brother at his own apartment for three days straight with a tenderness he was unaware he possessed. During this time, he does not tell the frantic Bruce or even Dick where Timmy is; he figures that if they have worked Tim into this state, then they can suffer their own demons for a while.

13. Dick doesn't have favourites in his family - if he did, he'd never admit to it. However, when it comes to sharing a bed for the night, he hates sharing with Jason because he snores and steals the blankets, and Damian is wriggly and sometimes talks in his sleep. Tim, on the other hand, is calm and easy to cuddle with.

14. One of the most embarrassing moments of Tim's life was when Damian was kidnapped. Out of the entire family, he was the only one to cry when they found out who had taken the youngest of the family. He'll never let on that this was because he knows how hurt Dick was by Jason's death, and he sees Damian as little brother most of the time. Tim doesn't want to lose anyone else.

15. On a cold December night, the Red Hood took a bullet for Batman. Nobody saw him for weeks after that.

16. One of his proudest moments as a father is the moment when Bruce realises that, even if his kids don't always get along, they are there for each other when they truly should be. He comes to this conclusion the night that he sees Jason laughing with Dick following a tense battle, and his two youngest holding a civil conversation together long enough to work out the location of a prostitution ring.

17. Damian is secretly pleased every time Conner comes to visit the manor. His mere presence stirs up some sort of protective fury in Alfred, and Damian thinks it's hilarious that the butler might one day attack the boy. Privately Damian thinks that Alfred would win.

18. Dick is deeply ashamed to admit it, but secretly he always hopes that something goes wrong between Bruce and Damian, if only so he can have his little brother all to himself again.

19. The four boys who have all been, at once point in their lives, called 'Robin', do not watch horror movies. It's not that they're scared, it's just that the movies are always dull and boring to watch. They've all seen enough horror in real life that the movies just can't stir up the desired adrenaline.

20. Ironically, the only one of the four who has never seriously considered suicide is Jason.

21. Bruce knows that it's wrong to have a favourite child, but he's only human. His favourite child knows that Bruce has one, but never for one second thinks that it's him.

22. After spending any amount of time in Wayne Manor, Jason always realises that he misses one person the most out of all of them. He thinks it's because, after his return to the living world and his uneasy 'truce' with the family, the one who remembers the little things about him from his childhood is Alfred.

23. Damian's bedroom shares one wall with Tim's bedroom. On the nights that Conner sleeps over - much to Bruce's dismay - he can hear frequent bangs on that wall. What he doesn't know is that Conner and Tim have barely got past first base in their relationship, and that they hit the wall with their fists on purpose because they know it will make the little demon uncomfortable.

24. The Halloween chocolate fondu party was a terrible mistake. If there's one sight that Bruce never, ever wants to witness again, it's the sight of a drunken Jason bathing in the chocolate fountain while Dick gorges himself on marshmallows.

25. One morning, Tim wakes up with his fingernails painted scarlet. Nobody will admit to being the culprit, so Tim does the only sensible thing he can think of: he simply gets payback on everybody.

26. Every member of the family has a hidden talent. Dick can identify any bird by its call; Jason can embroider so finely that the stitching seems like artwork; Tim can sing remarkably well; Damian can recite beautiful poetry. Bruce will never tell a soul that he is a particularly skilled free-style dancer and Alfred has never revealed to anybody that his archery is good enough to rival the best.

27. Dick thought it would be a good idea for he and all his brothers to watch a musical together, and after much pleading and bargaining, he eventually got them all settled in one room. Unforunately for him, the only musical they had on DVD was 'The Rocky Horror Picture Show'. Nobody but him had ever seen it before. Jason now thinks he would look fantastic in that corset, Tim has big ideas for seducing Conner and Damian is thoroughly confused.

28. Damian envies Dick. Not because of a skill or an achievement or his brother's relationship with his father, but because Dick's biological parents seem, when he talks about them, so loving, both of their son and of each other.

29. One year, the Joker escapes from Arkham on Tim's birthday. With the exception of Alfred, everyone in the family forgets about his celebrations in favour of hunting and capturing the escaped maniac. The only one who ever apologises for his absence at the aborted party is Jason.

30. Jason once talked himself into making it up with Bruce and properly returning to the family. When he arrived at the manor, he looked into the window and his heart sank at what he saw: Dick and Damian playing together on some electronic games console while Bruce and Tim sat, cuddled up, talking on the sofa. They looked to be such a normal family in that moment that Jason slunk back to his apartment without saying a word.

31. The game of Scrabble is permenantly banned in the manor. Bruce doesn't care how educational it could be; he's sick of having to replace dictionaries because Damian clunks Tim over the head with it every time they play.

32. There is not a Robin who has not embarrassed himself whilst drunk. Dick fell off the roof, Jason ruined an expensive carpet throwing up on it, Tim streaked halfway through the manor before he was caught, and Damian exclaimed his undying love for all of them.

33. Jason once told Damian that pole dancing was an extremely difficult technique to master and that only the most serious of martial artists could perfect it. Damian scoffed but secrely took up self-taught classes. This went on for several weeks before Tim accidently caught him practicing and laughed so hard that Bruce, Dick and Alfred came running.

34. Not that they would ever admit it, but each of the boys had their favourite villain to fight. For Dick it was Poison Ivy, since he enjoyed a harmless flirt with her before halting her crimes. For Damian it was Bane, since he liked being able to best a villain who was much stronger physically. For Tim, it was the the Riddler since he liked the challenge to his mind. As for Jason, it would always be the Joker.

35. Following his return, Bruce was accutely aware that Dick shared a bond with Damian; this never bothered him. However, he didn't know how to feel about Jason's slowly developing relationship with Tim. It both relieved and terrified him.

36. The year that it was only Dick, Damian and Alfred in the manor for Christmas, Dick claimed that Santa was going to come down the chimney to give them presents. Damian, who had been totally unfamiliar with the concept of Santa Claus, was freaked out by the prospect of gifts left by a stranger who broke into your home via the chimney. After Dick went to bed he lit a fire to be sure that, if it was all true, the intruder would get burned as a punishment for breaking in.

37. Alfred is notoriously difficult to prank. But once, when Bruce was away on business, Dick teamed up with Jason and Damian to fool the butler. They orchestrated new files on Kryptonian biology and sent a fake message from Tim telling the family that he was feeling ill lately. Alfred, ever the dutiful helper, did some research on the Bat-computer and discovered that the most likely cause was: 'pregnancy, often achieved between two males in the Kryptonian species'. Alfred calmly rose to his feet, retrieved the Kryptonite and made his way to Smallville, where Tim was spending the weekend with Conner. Needless to say, Tim has never been more confused than when a furious butler turned up and brandished the deadly stone, claiming that nobody knocked up his grandsons and got away with it.

38. The only member of the family who willingly took geography as a school subject was Damian. He wanted to learn more about the world in relation to the differences between where he had lived and where he lived now; he wanted a reason to be seen researching this at home.

39. Much to Dick's annoyance, the member of the family who looks best in a dress is Tim.

40. Dick is vaguely disappointed that Damian's nightmares become less and less frequent as he ages. He knows it's a good thing in the long run but he misses the frightened child letting go of his emotions while hiding under the covers with his older brother. Dick does not know that his thoughts mirror the thoughts that Bruce once had as Dick got older and his own nightmares became less frequent.

41. Sometimes Nightwing goes on patrol in Gotham with the Red Hood. He neither adopts his brother's violent tactics nor accepts them, but watching him commit those acts is still better than not seeing Jason at all.

42. Tim may not show it but he's extremely glad that even when Bruce returns, Dick and Damian are very close. It means that after he has his terrible, more frequent than ever nightmares, he can always go to Bruce for comfort and know that he won't run into Damian, who will always go to Dick.

43. The family, save Jason, attempts a normal Thanksgiving dinner one year. After Dick causes a minor explosion trying to help Alfred in the kitchen and Damian tries to replace the turkey in the oven with Tim, Bruce vows to tie them all to their chairs the next year.

44. Damian does not like Barbara Gordon. It's not that he has any great disrespect for her or that she's done something in particular to offend him, it's just that she takes Dick away from him and Damian doesn't like sharing.

45. All four of the boys have, at one point or another and for varying reasons, had to put on make-up. Tim was embarrassed, Jason scrubbed it off as it was applied and Damian insisted on applying it himself and smudged it terribly. Dick still insists that he looked fabulous.

46. Tim does not like opera, but when Bruce tells him that he wants some company, Tim agrees without hesitation because he can tell that the music has some connection to Bruce's childhood.

47. Dick sings in the shower. He is barely aware that he does it. The rest of the family, however, have noticed and all secretly resolved to purchase earplugs for the next time they hear that dreadful noise.

48. One year, on the anniversary of Jason's death, a package arrives for the Red Hood. Inside is a crowbar, and the next day the Joker is found in a dark alley, bloodied and beaten. Knowing that it was at least a provoked attack, Bruce refrains from confronting Jason about it. What he doesn't know is that Jason did not even leave his apartment last night and is currently wondering which family member is looking out for him.

49. Sometimes Damian wishes that he had had a more normal childhood but at least he now has a proper home. Even if he doesn't get along with everyone in the manor, he is fairly confident that the people within its walls care for him on some level. In fact, the only one he has doubts about is Bruce.

50. The four boys have each, at one point in their lives, had a crush on a female villain. For Dick it was Poison Ivy with her silky voice and flaming red hair. It was Catwoman for Tim, who was fine with admitting to it until he realised that something existed between her and Bruce. Damian favoured - not that he would ever admit it - Harley Quinn, whom he found to be doing a job that was far beneath her. And for Jason it was Talia; he never mentioned it or admitted to it except when it was needed to irritate Damian or Bruce.

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Hazeru - We already have more in the making if this gets a good enough response.

Hera - We're open to suggestions in reviews/messages for future drabbles.

Hazeru - Please R&R!


	2. Chapter 2

Hazeru - Same warnings as last chapter.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

51. None of the family will ever admit that they know exactly who is responsible for what can only be described as an apparent tornado in the cave. Dick will never have that amount of sugar in one go ever again.

52. They all had their own way of being soothed by Bruce in their darkest times as children. Dick liked to sit next to Bruce with one of the man's arms around him while Jason much preferred to sit on his lap. Tim was unusually shy about it but he loved sneaking into Bruce's bed to just be held. Damian merely sat next to his father without the physical contact.

53. When Jason wakes up in his apartment one morning, bandaged up and aching, he's acutely aware that he remembers nothing of the previous night but somehow he knows that the one who got him home safely was his older brother.

54. Contrary to popular belief, Bruce has never used the excuse of "I'm Batman" in the cave. He doesn't have to.

55. Party planning is always left to the cheerful one of the bunch but it is not Dick who is the life of the party. When he's drunk and has forgotten why he doesn't get along with the rest of them, Jason can turn the most dismal of events into a riot.

56. During their best times together, the only one of the kids to ever call Bruce by simply his given name was Dick. Jason called him Daddy, Tim called him Dad and Damian has always addressed him as Father.

57. Dick is the Golden Boy, Jason is the Black Sheep and Damian is the Demon Spawn. Tim is sometimes saddened by his own lack of title.

58. Bruce hates it when he gets an unexpected visit from Clark Kent. Not only has the man invaded his home, he has already turned his children against him: it's completely impossible for him to look suitably irritated and threatening with Dick laughing and Tim chattering away to Superman.

59. Jason was prone to colds and flus as a child. He'll never admit to it even if you held him at gun point, but there were a few occasions - just once or twice - when he deliberately stood out in the rain hoping to catch a cold, because the coughs were always worth it to have Bruce doting on him.

60. Damian will never let anybody find out and he still intends to one day take up his father's mantle, but during the three horrible days when the family doesn't know if Tim is going to survive his injuries or not, Damian makes a vow to one day take over the name of Red Robin should the original not make it through the night.

61. Bruce insists that the bats in the cave do not need names. Jason never gave it a thought, Damian thinks the notion is stupid and Tim has a favourite bat whom he names but ignores the rest. Dick is distraught by the fact that the bats do not have names and privately makes up a name for every single one of them. In fact, he does this every time he's in the cave because he can never remember the names that he gave them the last time.

62. Both Bruce and Dick are worried when Red Robin takes to patrolling the harsher areas of the city alongside the Red Hood. They both want to trust Jason but when it comes to Tim, they just can't bring themselves to. If Red Robin ever loses his moral values, they are holding Jason personally responsible.

63. Jason once glued Dick's face to his pillow. It was honest payback for something but Jason can no longer remember what.

64. Tim is secretly touched that Jason sits with him in the medical bay while he lies unconcious, but nonetheless he is hurt that neither Bruce nor Dick do the same.

65. After a mother out with her children witnesses Bruce's lack of interaction with his ten year old son, she makes a point of giving him advice; she gives him a verbal list of activities which he can do with his son and he thanks her. However, he doesn't even try to remember the list, because he has no intention of trying to get Damian to go to the park to play and he's sure as hell not going to ask him to play hide and seek around the manor. So far, Damian is the only child that he's not misplaced for over four hours due to a forgotten game.

66. None of them like it when Bruce brings home a new girlfriend. They all know that she'll be out of their lives for good the following day but just knowing what's going to occur that night is enough that none of them can ever look Bruce in the eye the next day.

67. Despite being the most initially violent of them, it is Damian who will bring home stray animals because he can't bear to see them cold and hungry on the streets. Alfred always knows it's going to be a bad day when he enters the cave and finds that several new pets have been acquired overnight.

68. Games like Connect 4 and Operation are taken very seriously in Wayne Manor. Bruce will never understand why his sons feel the need to not only play these games, but to play in the dark.

69. Gardening is Alfred's job, but Tim likes to help occasionally; he finds the work very methodical and soothing, and likes being outdoors without being perched on a building for once.

70. Dick adores his little brother, but privately he thinks it's a little creepy that Damian has frequent staring matches with the stray animals he brings home. Sometimes he wonders if the boy does it on purpose.

71. Conner Kent cares deeply for Tim but he never likes visiting him at the manor - everyone looks like him as if they're simultaneously pleased and enraged. Conner doesn't know who he should be more worried about, the butler or the odd one that perches outside Tim's bedroom window to make sure Conner isn't taking away Tim's innocence.

72. Most people think that Dick's biggest regret in his life must be the death of his parents; they're wrong. He once drunkenly slept with a girl he met at a party and got her pregnant. His biggest regret is that she miscarried the baby and he lost his child before he even got to meet them.

73. Jason occasionally wishes that he and Talia could have had a real relationship. It's not that he even likes her, it's just that he can't help but grin when he imagines how much that would have annoyed both Bruce and Damian.

74. When Alfred leaves town for the week, Bruce insists that they don't need to order take-out and that they can cook for themselves. Four hours later, he sits with Dick, Tim and Damian eating take-away pizza while all four studiously ignore the blackened kitchen.

75. Damian sometimes has wistful dreams about his time with the League of Assassins. He didn't expect to miss them and thinks that they must just be a representation of his feelings for his mother, who he misses even if he doesn't know why.

76. Dick privately thinks that any children fathered by him with Barbara Gordon as their mother would be downright beautiful people all round. He occasionally thinks about their fictional life together, in which he is a dutiful father and she a caring mother, before returning to a reality in which he knows that he is too dedicated to crime fighting to ever have a steady, settled family.

77. The Christmas after Jason settled a truce with the rest of his family, the entire family sat down to Christmas dinner for the first time. During the meal, Dick choked on his food, Tim and Damian started a food fight, and Bruce's hand slipped while attempting to carve the turkey and he nearly sliced off his own thumb. Jason doesn't know what confuses him more: his bizarre family's antics or the fact that he actually enjoys himself.

78. Messing with the hot water in the manor is a mistake. Nothing makes Bruce crankier than his blissful morning shower suddenly turning icy cold and if he doesn't know who is to blame, he will punish everyone except Alfred - which is probably why Alfred is the one who pulls this particular prank the most often.

79. Tim Drake has lost a lot of people in his life but he's never really cried about it, choosing instead to keep his feelings bottled up inside for fear of them getting the better of him. He finally breaks down at another death, that of a standard house-plant, when it all becomes too much and he decides that anything and anyone around him are doomed. Nobody is in the manor to witness his breakdown and Bruce will never tell him that he saw it all on the secret camera later that night.

80. During what Dick affectionaly dubs 'family bonding time', the only movie available to watch is a documentary on World War Two. Not wanting to disband the peace that they have settled into, nobody comments on the morbid topic and they all pretend not to be uncomfortable at the subject of exploded warehouses.

81. How Damian ever managed to fall into the cotton candy machine no-one will ever know but he has avoided carnivals ever since.

82. Online shopping can be an addiction; every one of the kids have it but none of them will ever reveal their love of it. Dick browses DVDs, mostly comedy and action, for hours on end; Jason will spend far too much time pretending not to be shopping in the online black market for high grade weapons; Tim has long since hacked government websites and illegally purchased plans for new machinery; Damian feels like such a girl that he would rather die than admit to his fascination of shopping for new shoes and clothes online.

83. Tim still remembers the third time he had to dress up as a girl for a mission. Dick curled his short hair into such tight ringlets that it stuck straight up for the next four days.

84. All of the boys in the family have a vague idea of what they would have liked to do with their lives if they'd never gotten into crime fighting, if they'd had normal lives. Dick thinks he would have stayed a circus acrobat. Jason will never admit it out loud but he thinks he'd have made a great doctor, if he'd worked hard in school and got the grades necessary for the job. Tim still vaguely - in his own mind only - wants to be a teacher; he isn't sure what subject he wants to teach, though, perhaps a science or computing. Damian thinks he'd have made one hell of an actor but he knows it would never work out - he wouldn't be able to put up with his fellow actors not being able to perfect their lines the first time.

85. Jason is a damn good shot with a gun but nobody's perfect. He will never forget the time he missed the murderer and hit the innocent little girl; he has nightmares about that particular victim at least once a month and they haunt him almost as much as his nightmares about his family finally giving up on him completely.

86. Dick doesn't get drunk that often but if he was drunk the previous night, chances are Jason had something to do with it.

87. Bruce has pictures of the different times when his sons decide that they're going to grow facial hair. Jason's never suited him but at least it grew in evenly. Dick's was patchy and downright hilarious, and everyone's still waiting for the day when Tim finally manages to grow any at all.

88. Damian loathes social networking sites. As far as he's concerned, either talk to someone in person or don't talk to them at all. He finds it to be a cowardly way of communication, but when Dick moves back to Bludhaven he finds those sites to be surprisingly useful.

89. At the school they all attended, every single one of Bruce's sons had to take the mandatory art lessons. Damian was the only one who ever had any interest in the subject - Dick was useless at it, Jason found it to be pointless and Tim had to continuously hide that he feels vaguely nauseated at the smell of fresh paint.

90. Bruce will forever remember the fight they all had over Jason's return to the family. It is still the only time in his life that he can ever remember Alfred begging him for anything.

91. Tim no longer worries when he enters his apartment to find it has been repainted, redecorated or remodelled; it's just Dick's way of telling his brother that he came to check up on him and got bored waiting.

92. When the family find a little girl who has been wandering the streets alone, they are forced to take her in until proper arrangements can be made for her. Much to everyone's surprise, the one she took a shine to was Jason. Nobody knows that he still keeps an eye on the child from a distance now that she lives with her new adopted family, watching over her the way he imagines he would do for his own neices or nephews.

93. Dick cares deeply for Jason, and he can't help but be ashamed that every time he sees Jason with either Tim or Damian, he instantly has doubts concerning how much he actually trusts his brother.

94. Tim can hear when Damian has nightmares through the bedroom wall. Whenever Bruce is working and Dick isn't around, Tim will sneak into the room, unnoticed, and soothe the boy before he wakes. He thinks nobody knows about this but really the only one that doesn't know is Damian.

95. Damian still remembers the day that Dick drove to his school, pulled him out of class and took him out for a day of pointless 'fun' activities. He was bored out his mind but didn't have the heart to tell his brother who looked like the whole idea had been a massive epiphany for him.

96. Bruce loves his boys - he just doesn't love that they conspire against him.

97. Alfred's birthday celebration is an annual event that all the family looks forward to - they might make living hells out of one another's lives, but nobody dares to spoil the day for the butler.

98. A brotherly game of poker is fine. A brotherly game of strip poker is not, no matter how much Dick insists.

99. Damian's fourth solo patrol does not go well and he ends up beaten and bloodied, lying in an alleyway. When he arrives back at manor the following morning he tells Bruce that he got home of his own accord, but the truth is that Jason found him and patched him up, all the while lecturing him about dangerous risks that lead to dead Robins.

100. Tim will never tell Bruce that Jason taught him how to shoot a gun.

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	3. Chapter 3

Hera - Same warnings apply, here's 101-150.

Disclaimer: I own nothing

101. They all had those childhood fears that they never really forgot. For Bruce it was, obviously, bats. For Dick it was a standard fear of the dark; Jason hated needles; Tim was initially scared of heights. Only Damian carried his fear into his teenage years - his fear of being rejected.

102. If there's one thing that bothers Alfred about all four of his 'grandsons' being in the manor at the same time, it's that when the cookies go missing he has more culprits to track down.

103. Red Robin hates being forced to patrol with the Demon Spawn. That doesn't mean that he won't take a bullet for him.

104. Bruce still remembers the last time he refused to dress up for Halloween. He fell asleep after patrol and woke up with a 'Hitler moustache' drawn on his face. It didn't wash off for three days and it wasn't nearly as funny as Dick made it out to be.

105. Every time he sees a sitcom about a dysfunctional family, Tim can't help but feel that the characters' lives are completely normal compared to his and his family's.

106. Bruce trusts Dick, Jason and Tim well enough to drive the Batmobile even if he doesn't let them know this, but he fears for the lives of anyone within a fifty mile radius when Damian gets behind the wheel.

107. Nothing really fazes the butler any more but it isn't exactly normal for two of your grandsons to arrive home tarred and feathered - especially when you're fairly certain that another of them is responsible for it.

108. Building a fort out of blankets and cushions is one of life's small pleasures. Dick will not rest until he has somehow gotten Damian to appreciate this.

109. Bruce once lost a bet to Dick over the results of a 'friendly' match between Damian and Tim. Dick laboured long and hard over what to make his father figure do but eventually decided that Bruce should obtain and wear a Superman costume for a full day, work included. Bruce was not amused in the slightest. Clark, on the other hand, thought it was hilarious.

110. The family once received an email with an attached picture of Alfred speaking with Jason whilst Bruce, Damian and Dick napped on the couch and Tim sprawled out across the table sound asleep. They have no idea who took the picture and intend to find out, if only so that they can destroy any existing copies.

111. Jason once awoke to find his dingy flat covered in brand new, sparkling Christmas decorations. He knew that it was probably something to do with his older brother, and he wouldn't have minded so much if it hadn't been the middle of April.

112. One of the best birthday presents Alfred ever received was a photograph of Tim and Damian, standing with one arm around each other and smiling broadly at the camera. He appreciates that they would endure the implications of the picture just for him.

113. There have been odd occasions when Batman has worked alongside the Red Hood. During those times, it always worries Bruce just how alike he and Jason are in some respects - like how, if he himself was willing to kill, Batman would closely resemble Red Hood.

114. Tim doesn't let his oldest brother know just how much he misses him. Ever since Damian came into the picture, the most time he gets with Dick is when Red Robin and Nightwing go on patrol together.

115. Damian once pranked Tim by informing Bruce and Dick via anonymous email that Tim had lost his virtue to Conner Kent. Neither of them completely believe that it was only a joke and Tim is still plotting revenge.

116. Waking up in a bed that is covered with kittens is not as fun as it sounds; in reality it is mostly small scratches and an unpleasant smell, no matter how cute they might be. Dick knows that one of his brothers is to blame, he just has to figure out which one.

117. Not too long after Bruce returns, Red Robin collapses from exhaustion not too far from the manor and is found and brought back by Nightwing. This is Bruce's first indication of how Timmy has pushed himself too far, and what scares him most is that he knows he has only scratched the surface of what his third son went through in his absence.

118. Even though he shares a bit of a past with the woman - in a short, strange way - Jason nonetheless listens to what Damian has to say about his mother. Jason knows what it's like to have 'mommy issues'.

119. Bruce keeps individual photographs of all four of his children on the table by his bed. He also has one empty picture frame awaiting a photo; when things have settled down enough, he hopes to have one of all four of them together.

120. Robin once went on patrol with the Red Hood. He's not sure who he freaked out more, Batman or Nightwing.

121. The boys think it's always fun to use Halloween as an excuse to dress up as villains. Bruce disagrees; he's sick of seeing 'Two-Face' in the Batmobile while 'Poison Ivy' uses the computer.

122. Dick is the only person in the family who knows that Jason has a tattoo on his hip which he got shortly after his return from the dead. He caught a glimpse of it once - when bandaging his brother up after a nasty fight - and pretended not to have seen it. He doesn't want to know why, of all the things in the world, Jason would have a tattoo of a crowbar.

123. Tim's almost glad that Bruce doesn't exactly approve of his relationship with Conner Kent, just because having a parent dislike your boyfriend is a fairly normal problem and most of Tim's problems are strictly abnormal. He likes to pretend that Bruce's reasons for having problems with the relationship are the normal ones.

124. One Christmas, Dick and Barbara posed as Santa and Mrs Claus for a Christmas card picture. Barbara suggested using Jason, Tim and Damian for elves. Dick was all for this until he discovered that, when faced with the prospect of dressing up as elves, his brothers presented a united front that said no.

125. Damian and Tim once made a bet with each other: whoever could shock the other into silence first was the winner. The competition went on for three days before Damian won. His victory was sealed as he latched onto Tim and hugged him tightly, proclaiming that he loved him so much that Tim was his favourite brother. Tim was furious that he lost the bet; Dick was just astounded that Damian's favourite could be anyone but him and took some time to convince that it had all been for a greater cause.

126. The noisy pigeons outside Damian's bedroom window have the unfortunate luck of waking up the sleeping demon after a six hour patrol. After disposing of them in his own manner, the boy is lectured by Bruce about how it's not okay to shoot at pigeons. He thinks it's worth it, both to get some undisturbed sleep and because he's impressed the Red Hood.

127. When he was very little, Jason believed firmly that there was a monster under every bed. Not ever having a proper bed, this was not his problem. However, when he moved into Wayne Manor, he suddenly had his own bed - one with space beneath it in which a monster could hide. He has never told Bruce that the reason he snuck into bed with him was because of the monster, not the nightmares, and he has no idea that Bruce knew the truth all along.

128. Dick doesn't really care how Tim managed to acquire pictures of Barbara Gordon in a swimsuit but he wishes he knew how his brother had fixed it to be his seemingly unchangeable desktop background. He's scared to open his laptop around her.

129. A stray dog once managed to rush past the butler and into Wayne Manor, instantly becoming a favourite of the boys. Bruce was insistent that they were not keeping it, but Dick remedied the situation by taking the animal to live in his apartment in Bludhaven under the name Stray. All his brothers have visited in order to spend some time with the dog, but it was still Dick's idea to put a cape and a mask on the poor hound.

130. Bruce was very proud that at the youthful age of thirteen, Tim could cope with university level computing science and mathematics. This didn't mean that he liked having to explain to his son, for the hundredth time, that Tim still had to do basic school level subjects in order to keep up appearances no matter how boring he found them.

131. Jason showing up drunk at the manor in the middle of the night isn't unfamiliar. He does it on purpose because he wants to see who cares enough to take him inside and put him to bed.

132. After they all settle into an unofficial truce with the black sheep of the family, Bruce is the only one who still cannot relax; it's not because he's incapable of it, it's because he doesn't want to forget what it was like to lose his son. Doing so would be an insult to Jason's memory. He keeps a crowbar under his bed and holds the cold, hard weight of it whenever he thinks he might be beginning to forget.

133. When Alfred is out for a weekend away with his friend Margaret and Bruce is on solo patrol, the boys all take shots of vodka - even Damian. Dick, who was supposed to be in charge and fairly drunk by the time he noticed, blames both Jason and Tim for their little brother's drunken state. Damian, had he not been asleep already, would have smirked that they were getting the blame for his crime.

134. Damian has no interest in his father's public line of work, but it stings a little nonetheless that Tim is named the heir to Wayne Enterprises.

135. Nightwing patrols solo in Gotham one icy February night and finds himself surrounded by men with semiautomatic guns. In the midst of the fight, somebody saves his life by taking down one that he hadn't noticed. Assuming that his partner had followed him despite being told not to, Nightwing gives Robin the credit and says nothing to the boy about it to avoid punishing him for disobeying orders. If he had spoken to him, he would have known that Damian was never there, and then perhaps Red Robin would have gotten the credit he deserved.

136. When he returns from 'being dead', Bruce finds that his third son gets sick much more easily than he used to. When Tim tells him the reason for this, he is filled with a guilt he hasn't felt since he first saw Damian.

137. To mark the anniversary of his return to the living and to the family, Dick somehow convinces Jason to join them in a friendly game of dares. After the agony that is having his legs savagely waxed, Jason decides that even if he reconciles with them all properly he will never move back into the manor.

138. Damian is a bright and very capable child, but he has a strange aversion to sudoku puzzles. When Tim discovers this, he challenges the boy to complete a puzzle before him. Tim only adds to Damian's anger and humiliation by not only finishing his sudoku long before his younger brother, but by doing so after giving him a five minute head start.

139. Dick and Jason once woke up on a beach in Hawaii. They have absolutely no idea how they got there.

140. As a young child, Dick used to wonder if it annoyed Bruce when he would crawl into bed with the man after having a nightmare just to cuddle up and not sleep alone. When he, as an adult, takes on the role of the adult doing the comforting for a distressed Damian, he realises that his worries were all for nothing; he loves it and is fairly sure that Bruce did too.

141. The only one to have even been caught looking longingly at the knife he held with unmistakable thoughts running through his mind is Tim. Surprisingly enough the one who caught him was Jason, who shocked Tim by not getting angry with him but rather by sitting the boy down and explaining to him that no matter how bad life seemed, death was worse. That was Timothy Drake's last completely serious thought of suicide; he was clever enough to take the advice from someone who knew.

142. Dick is a master acrobat, Jason is willing to kill, Tim is too smart for his own good and Damian is a ninja and trained assassin. Given all this, Bruce finds it hilarious that even with their combined strengths they are no match for Alfred.

143. Bruce knows that things are uncomfortably tense between him and Jason, but he sees how happy his son's return has made Dick and that's enough for him to encourage Jason to stick around.

144. Damian has, on three separate occasions, awoken to find whiskers drawn on his cheeks in what he is fairly sure is eyeliner. He doesn't know what to question about it more, and hits Tim when he sees him as punishment even though he doesn't know who did it. Dick smirks as he sees this - it's his favourite way of getting back at Tim for doing something to annoy him: by having Damian hit him instead because this way he gets to mess with his littlest brother at the same time.

145. After seventy two hours of being awake and having gotten a mere forty minutes of sleep, Bruce is awoken only to find his visitor has disappeared. He knows that it was Alfred though; the butler's the only one brave enough to do such a thing.

146. They will never, ever reveal this to the rest of the family but Jason and Tim have a pact in which they agree that, should the worst ever happen to both Bruce and Dick, they will raise Damian no matter how much they know they will fight with him.

147. April Fools' Days is a warzone in Wayne Manor. It begins with buckets of ice water, progresses into glue covered objects and then onto being tied to the bottom of the Batmobile. Batman once drove around for half an hour before he realised that Nightwing was attached to the bottom of the car, roughed up and not happy in the slightest that Bruce hadn't heard him shouting.

148. Bruce had always reassured his children by telling them how much he loved them. This does not work with Damian, who is adamant that Bruce is forced to love him as he is his biological son. This has always been Bruce's trump card and he has no idea what else to say to his son, which contributes to their somewhat strained relationship.

149. During his time serving as Batman, Dick pretends not to notice that any time Damian has trouble with somebody in civilian clothes, that person is mysteriously injured. He knows Damian's not responsible but can't help but wonder who exactly is.

150. When he first came to the manor, Dick brought a teddy bear with him. When he met the new Boy Wonder, he passed the plush toy onto Jason. When Tim took up the mantle of Robin, the bear became his by default. However, when Damian became Robin the bear had gone missing and Dick was vaguely saddened that he could not pass it onto his youngest brother. He does not know that the bear didn't go missing at all - Tim still has it in his possession and is awaiting the day when he does not need it to feel soothed at night, when he will finally pass it down to Damian whether the boy wants to accept it or not.

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Hera - As ever, R&R and tell us which ones were your favourites! :)


	4. Chapter 4

Hera - Here's numbers 151 - 200, enjoy.

Disclaimer: I own nothing

151. Alfred was the one who offered to teach Dick how to drive. After the first lesson, he insisted that Bruce would be the boy's instructor and never even got in a car with any of the others. To this day Bruce has never seen him more terrified.

152. After an attack by the Joker and his goons, the Red Hood was angered that although the psychopath only just managed to escape with his life, he would make a full recovery. He was also amused that the one who put the criminal into that state was not him, but Batman; he likes to think that it was an honest attempt at revenge even though the rational part of himself knows that the Bat's moral code would never allow him to kill.

153. One might think that the blood they share would make it easier for Bruce to accept Damian as his son. In reality, it made it that much harder.

154. When Tim finds out that somebody threatened Conner to stay away from him except for strictly hero business, he was livid. Naturally he assumes that it has something to do with Bruce. Conner doesn't know if it's really a good idea to tell him that, actually, it was Jason.

155. When he was in town for business, Superman once showed up when Commisioner Gordon summoned Batman. Gordon found it almost amusing; Batman was just annoyed.

156. After Bruce's return from 'the dead', Dick spends more time than before with Jason. He tries not to think of their meetings as compensation for the time and closeness he has lost with Tim, who still feels betrayed.

157. Some of Jason's best memories come from his early days in the manor when Bruce spent hours teaching him the essential skill of swimming since he had never learned. Even now he finds swimming relaxing.

158. Nightwing once posed a question to Damian: which identity would he rather take up, Red Hood or Red Robin? Damian could have answered immediately but instead chose to say neither. He knows that Dick could never understand his reasoning and he wasn't willing to explain.

159. Bruce never liked Conner Kent's visits to the manor but they were infinitely better than when Roy Harper visited.

160. During the time when Bruce was believed to be dead, there was always at least one night a week in which all four of his sons would cry themselves to sleep; the reasons for their tears were all different but the common denominator was always Bruce.

161. The boys still remember the time they got into the long lasting 'Coke Versus Pepsi' argument; Tim has a scar from that day and they never did reach an agreement.

162. Bruce has always been proud of Dick, but the thing he's most proud of about his eldest son is that when faced with such a similar childhood tragedy, Dick found a way to go through life smiling.

163. Alfred sometimes finds communicating with Damian very difficult. Not because of the child's personality but because of his appearance; Damian resembles his father so much and Alfred finds it hard to believe that they could be simultaneously so similar and yet so different.

164. Jason never wants to spend a night at the manor again. The last time he did, somebody put a massive fake spider on the pillow next to him while he was sleeping. When he woke up, he screamed so loud that Bruce, still dressed as Batman, came running all the way from the cave. He hadn't seen Bruce laugh so much in a very long time.

165. Dick can barely bring himself to fight Ra's al Ghul. In a strange way, he feels like he owes the man something for returning his brother to him.

166. Every family member reacts differently to being ill. Bruce will pretend that everything is alright and work himself through it with lemon and honey tea from his faithful butler. Dick, despite being a naturally sociable person, likes to be left alone to sleep it off. Jason tends to work through it himself but what he really likes is to fall asleep on someone's shoulder; in his childhood years that shoulder belonged to Bruce. Tim wants to be left alone to quietly read a book but he takes great comfort in having somebody check in on him every so often. Damian will pretend he's fine and not admit to being sick - unless Dick is around because Dick is the exception to the rule; then Damian likes to be cuddled. As for Alfred, nobody ever knows that he's ill. Alfred can hide things even from Batman when he really wants to.

167. Jason didn't realise he had become, in his own way, part of the family until he found himself answering the call of the Bat-signal.

168. After he's soothed the boy after terrible nightmares, Dick was always pretend to fall asleep before his youngest brother. Damian will kiss him goodnight but only when he thinks Dick is already sleeping.

169. Following the death of Tim's father, it was not Bruce who soothed the child and cared for him in those early days, nor was it Dick, as most would expect. It was in fact Alfred, who understood that the boy needed someone who didn't know what he was going through - he needed somebody to sympathise with him, just for a few minutes, so that he could know his sorrow wasn't equal to weakness.

170. Oddly enough, the one who suffered the most from bullying at school was Damian.

171. On a rare day when all four of Bruce's sons were together in the same room in the manor, Dick had a music channel playing on the television and randomly remarked that the four of them should form a band. Tim laughed while Jason and Damian scowled but all four of them spent the night coming up with the perfect name for their fictional band.

172. The Joker might be crazy but even he's thought twice about messing with Robin with both Batman and Nightwing in the room.

173. Alfred is the only truly honest-with-himself member of the family. Everybody else is in denial about something.

174. Although none of them actually realise it, all four boys shared a childhood dislike of the Easter Bunny. Dick never believed, Jason thought it was stupid, Tim wouldn't eat candy from a stranger and Damian thought that world hunger would be stopped if they could only catch and breed giant rabbits like that.

175. Tim occasionally thinks that he should retire the identity of Red Robin and come up with a new persona; one that has no ties to Batman. But he always decides against it in the end - the name Robin just holds too much meaning for him to give up.

176. Jason can say no to Bruce all he likes but even he knows that he can't refuse the kind but firm requests of the family butler.

177. Bruce sometimes wonders what it would have been like to have daughters instead of sons, but he prefers reality to his imagination. As females, Dick would have had a teenage pregnancy and Tim would have an eating disorder. Jason would be unbearable at 'that time of the month' and Damian would be exactly the same but with the ability to seduce more villains.

178. Nobody in the family ever liked it when Dick grew his hair too long. In fact, three out of the other five have attempted to cut it while he was sleeping. Only one of them ever succeeded.

179. Hot dogs are a peculiar favourite of the family but they can't eat them very often; it's far too hard to sneak them past Alfred.

180. Dick once accompanied Tim and Damian to a circus that was travelling through Gotham City. He was fine until the acrobats performed but then he criticised their simple routine and left. That was the same day that Damian found out the whole truth about his oldest brother's childhood.

181. Ironically, the one who most easily accepted Bruce as his father during his childhood years was Jason.

182. At eleven years old, Damian already knows who he wants his first kiss to be with. He will never tell anybody who that person is.

183. Tim once went to check on Jason after the Red Hood failed to meet him at the agreed time and place to bust up a trafficking shipment. After finding his brother passed out and bleeding in his apartment, Tim patched him up and then cared for him. Jason woke up an hour before he let Tim become aware of this - having the brother whom he had nearly killed hold his hand and stroke his hair was just too nice to give up.

184. All the boys can play a musical instrument. Dick can play the acoustic guitar, Jason can play the piano, Tim can play the cello and Damian can play the flute. Bruce sometimes wonders how his four energetic and lively boys manage to play such calm, beautiful music.

185. Jason hates Bruce. He also loves him. Most of all, he hates that, after everything that happened, he still loves him.

186. They say that mothers can lift cars off their children. As is happens, younger brothers can do the same to save their older siblings.

187. Bruce is never pleased to have practically the entire Justice League in his home, but watching Damian attempt to look entirely unimpressed with the lot of them is too amusing for him to stop it happening again.

188. Dick wants to help Tim with his insecurity issues but he's too afraid to try; deep down, he knows that this is because his own actions caused many of them.

189. One Halloween, the boys, minus Jason, decorated Wayne Manor as a haunted house and proceeded to spend the evening trying to frighten one another. Halfway through the night with nothing happening, Damian got bored and crept out to go on patrol as he thought the other two must have already done the same. He still doesn't realise that the reason for the absence of his brothers is that they had stumbled into each other's traps - Dick was trapped in the basement with the spiders and Tim was caught in a net suspended from the high ceiling with no means of escape.

190. Dick spends too much time with Wally West; Jason spends too much time with Roy Harper; Tim spends too much time with Conner Kent. Bruce wonders who will be the equivalent annoyance for Damian.

191. Batman fears the influence that the Red Hood has over Robin, but even he can't deny that the two make a near unstoppable team.

192. Few people know that, when Tim finally decided to learn how to cook, the one who taught him was not Alfred. In was, in fact, Martha Kent, during one of Tim's many visits to Smallville.

193. There are some - just a few - videos that were illegally filmed during performances of the Flying Graysons which have been uploaded to the internet. When he finds himself missing his parents more than ever, Dick likes to watch them just to remember the clear definition of his father's face or the way the circus lights caught his mother's smile. There is only one performance that he can't bring himself to watch, and he has to avoid the most popular video.

194. He doesn't like to admit to it, but one of Damian's favourite things about living with his father and Alfred was that he got to decorate the manor for Christmas. He also loved that he got to do this before Dick arrived for the holidays; the look on his face was good for a laugh every year.

195. Jason is the only member of the family who likes strawberry pop-tarts. Alfred keeps a supply of them in the cupboard for whenever he visits.

196. Dick, Tim and Damian once visited the zoo and now they are all banned for life. Damian had a fight with an 'obnoxious' goat and Tim got stuck in a cage with a lion, and Bruce doesn't even want to know what Dick did that left him covered in flamingo feathers and with a permanent grudge against penguins.

197. Eventually all kids have to grow up and leave home; some miss it more than others. In Bruce's family, the one who truly missed life in the manor was the one who was ripped away from it and knew, upon his restoration, that there was no longer a place for him there.

198. While very drunk, Dick was dared to 'bring all the boys to the yard'. The sad thing wasn't that he tried but that he succeeded.

199. Tim loves it when Damian gets injured on patrol. Not because he enjoys seeing the boy hurt - he hates seeing anybody hurt - but because they are some of the only times when he can have a pleasant conversation with his little brother without fear of attack. Damian is surprisingly amiable when he's being patched up after a nasty fight.

200. Bruce can sympathise with Jason, Tim and Damian but the only one he could ever really empathise with was Dick.

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Hera - Please R&R


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